Freedom through Forgiveness
Everyone is likely familiar with the quote from Lewis B. Smeads that says, "To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." It's true that forgiveness brings freedom. So often when we engage the topic of forgiveness, we are faced with forgiving someone that has caused us pain in some way. The quote speaks to the fact that forgiving our offenders, actually releases us from the chains of resentment and bitterness. However, what if we're talking about our own sins?
Oftentimes in the counseling setting, counselees will present with a burden in which they will say something like, "I know God forgives me, but I can't seem to forgive myself." This too, is a type of prison. If it's true what the scriptures say that, "as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us" (Psalm 103:12). It actually says that God remembers them no more.
Isaiah 43:25: "I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more"
Jeremiah 31:34: "I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more"
Hebrews 8:12: "And their sin I will remember no more"
2 Corinthians 5:19-21: "For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people's sins against them"
Now someone with these feelings, might say, "yes, I know God forgets, but I cannot." It is worth pondering, "Why didn't God give us the ability to forget our own sins and the sins of others?" Let us consider the reason for remembering. First, and maybe the most obvious answer would be that we would be doomed to repeat all of the same mistakes and enter into all of the same dysfunctional relationships and/or patterns if we simply could not remember how wrong things went previously. So certainly there is a protective feature to our ability to remember. Yet, I'm not convinced that is the primary function for remembering. God is a God of tremendous mercy and grace. He intends to grow those who love Him into His image. Every time I remember others' transgressions against me as well as my transgressions against God and others; I get the opportunity to once again be reminded of God's unfailing mercy and grace. I get an opportunity to apply that mercy and grace to my offenders and to myself. Essentially, I get the opportunity to apply and live out the gospel in my life, simply by the act of remembering. When we are willing to think about it that way, remembering becomes the beauty of the gospel in action. This process of remembering the transgression and reminding ourselves of what Christ did on the cross, remembering that we were washed clean and that our debt was paid in full is what it takes to live out a gospel-centered life.
Consider how absurd it would be if I told you I borrowed a dollar from myself and felt the need to pay it back. It doesn't make sense, it's impossible to be in debt to yourself. This is similar to the idea of forgiving oneself. It's technically an impossibility, if you believe the gospel. It's also extremely prideful. Don't let the enemy convince you that you're taking a "humble" stance on the subject by being unable to forgive yourself; which is a lie and we know he is the "father of lies" (John 8:44). When we do not accept the forgiveness that is offered through the cross, essentially we are saying that what Christ did was simply not sufficient. It's like saying, "My sin was so bad that maybe He should've gotten back up on the cross after the resurrection and been crucified again, just for my sin." Think about how the enemy is at work in this line of thinking. The devil's number one goal is to keep you far from God and far from the truth. This lie that we need to forgive ourselves, makes God very small and us very big. It negates the entirety of the cross! Let us never allow that to be! This is why in Psalm 51:12 David said, "Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." This psalm tell us that David had once known the joy that came from peace with God. In this psalm he is talking about unconfessed sin robbing him of that joy. His sin and transgression was between him and God. Once he confessed, his joy was restored. David didn't continue to walk around with guilt and shame, although his transgressions were great (i.e., adultery, lies, murder), but once He took them to God, He was free.
Let us always remember that it's the truth that sets us free. Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth and the life" (John 14:6a). Whenever we are under the weight of condemnation and shame, we are likely believing a lie, intended on keeping us from the only One that continues to have the power to redeem us.
If you've been holding on to the lie that you cannot forgive yourself, remember that the enemy loves to put periods where God puts commas. "You cannot forgive yourself." The enemy wants you to stop there because a partial truth is just as good as a lie, and often much more effective. Yet God puts a comma there instead saying, "You cannot forgive yourself, but God can, He will, and He does.
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